The Art of Reading People - Lawrence Micolis

How many times have you assumed that you knew somebody and what they were about, only to be completely blindsided when they behave in a way that contradicts everything you thought you knew?

We often think we have a fair amount of ability in reading people until the moment when we're proven wrong. 

Chances are that you've heard the phrase, 'I read you like a book' which indicates that somebody has understood another's thought processes to the point that they're able to predict what that person might do next.  

Known as social intelligence, we like to kid ourselves that we are reading people when, in effect, we are mostly just guessing. In fact, for most people, 'reading people' is really just thinly disguised empathy where they are projecting their own feelings and thoughts onto the situation and reading it accordingly.  

Without the superpowers of a mind-reader, many of us suffer the consequences of ineffectual people reading throughout our lives. In his new book Ian Tuhovsky explores the art of reading people and, through a number of exercises and tutorial content, shows the reader how to more effectively identify and interpret the behavior of others in order to more fully understand their motivations and intentions. 

"The Art of Reading People" explains: 

• How to identify manipulative and toxic personalities - and the four personality types we should be aware of; those who are good and good for us, those who are good but bad for us, those who are bad but good for us and, those who are bad and bad for us 
• The dangers of simplistic labelling such as 'good' and 'bad'
• Differentiating between subjective and objective 'goodness' 
• How to identify the ways you are being manipulated by others without being aware of it
• How to read your relationships with others in order to understand your role in them
• Decoding the language that others use - particularly when they want something from you
• How to identify nihilists and solipsists
• How to understand your own emotional reaction to the behavior of others

Understanding people and what motivates their behaviors is the first step toward being able to predict future behaviors in order to avoid repeating mistakes.