WAY OF ESCAPE - ELLINGTON DR. B. J.

Way of Escape is a true life-long story that starts with the rape of a four-year-old girl. The very people she should have been able to trust and run to for help, betrayed her and introduced her to a realm of repeated sexual violation and other forms of ritual abuse. The incidents of her early life defined her self-concept and dictated her life course.

It portrays some of the abusive and ritualistic events in her life; some are described quite graphically; all are demonically inspired and represent the potential for evil in the hearts and minds of mankind.

The book's purpose is not to place blame on any group or individual, but to give credibility to survivors of abuse, and through the life of this little girl, offer reassurance that God is real. He is faithful and will always provide a way of escape - even when it is physically impossible to break free. God lovingly separates our consciousness and physical perceptions from the inescapable abuse. He allows us to “leave” while still being physically held captive – to dissociate ourselves from the painful situation.

In the realm of psychiatry, dissociation is labeled as a “disorder” – Dissociative Identity Disorder (formerly Multiple Personality Disorder). When there is no power or means to physically flee from a situation, how can being able to mentally and emotionally “leave” and preserve one’s self be called a disorder? In an inescapable abusive situation, fear and physical pain are the most horrific aspects of the victimization. How then, can it not be a blessing of God to escape to a place of psychological refuge where there is no pain, no fear? If someone being assaulted were able to run away to safety, would they not be considered resourceful, heroic, and extremely fortunate? Why then is this inward escape viewed with skepticism, or condemnation? The victim desperately strives to neutralize the terror and prevent the physical and emotional pain. Any method by which this is achieved must be applauded as inventive, and courageous.

In cases of childhood sexual, satanic, or repetitive trauma, dissociation is an effective method of survival. Just as the abusive events are sequestered away from the conscious memory, non-traumatic segments of one’s life are also hidden away - inaccessible. There may be limited memory of milestone events: early childhood, school years, significant relationships, weddings, childbirth, professional experiences, emotional losses, or joyous events. Looking back on life seems like the replay of a video from which segments have been removed and the remaining scenes re-attached in non-sequential, random order. There are parts of the plot that don’t make sense because there is nothing connecting them to the original story. God promises to give back the lost scenes, the experiences that were stolen from us for the gratification of others. He splices back together the soul that was fragmented so events can be remembered and reprocessed in their entirety, without re-experiencing the emotional and physical trauma.

Above all, Way of Escape is a story of redemption. From the sexual betrayal, disillusionment and ritualistic abuse of a small child, through her fragmented, emotionally volatile youth and early adulthood, God is faithful to bring about reclamation of innocence once lost, and restoration of a shattered soul. The journey is laborious and emotionally challenging, but through the counselor’s skilled and compassionate dedication, God’s unconditional love and wisdom, and the willingness of the broken human spirit to be healed, the chains of bondage are broken and wholeness is restored.

The author’s hope is that the shame, guilt and destructive life path that often result from emotional trauma be resolved and replaced with a positive self-concept, absence of self-persecution, and a future of hope and freedom from the past.